Postcard From Zhuhai - Part 2

Friday morning and I bumped into an old friend, utterly unexpected so far from where we met back in 2004, but oddly prescient for events that would unfold later in the day.

The old friend was a bright red Ferrari 550, and the last time our paths had crossed, and by the look of it the last time the car had raced, was at the Bahrain GT Festival, a one-off event in the tiny Gulf state that drew a bewildering array of GT cars to the then brand new GP circuit for a long weekend of fun and games.

The Ferrari dominated proceedings amidst a field not overly blessed with top GT1 machinery, it's campaign aided and abetted by a driver line up that would still be top flight today - Alan Simonsen and David Brabham.

Next major item on the agenda was the much anticipated WEC calendar announcement and the shock revelation of a race in Bahrain that was, even in isolation, controversial but infinitely more so when the direct clash with Petit Le Mans became clear!  Let's face it that looks suspiciously like someone other than the ACO deciding when, as well as where, that race was going to take place!
 
Friday night ranks as one of the weirdest evenings ever for DSC (though in fairness Thursday and later Saturday took some beating!)

With the ACO still undecided between Zhuhai and Shanghai for the 2012 Chinese race the local powers that be were pushing the boat out. We'd be treated to a drivers parade in downtown Zhuhai complete with closed streets, roller blading dragon dancers, weird large storks, overly officious local police and tens of thousands of seemingly almost entirely bewildered locals.

Over a period of three hours, following on from a beautifully staged reception in truly splendid surroundings, Zhuhai threw everything it had got at this - spectacular staging traditional music and dance featuring rollerblading dragon dancers and apparently a mass tribute to Rod Hull, epically mispronounced international racing drivers (though in all fairness not nearly as bad as Sebring!) and various racing personalities falling off golf buggies - truly top entertainment.

The highlights for me were Mika Hakkinen's driver failing to find the way out of the closed off area, Mika passed me sitting on the back of his AMG SL at least 6 times with the driver looking more panicked on each pass - At least he did better than the golf buggy driver for CRS Racing who did find a way out but was then left to navigate the full city centre traffic chaos with Tim Mullen and Roger Wills hanging off the back of the buggy for around half an hour!

Johnny Mowlem just about hung on to the Lotus 2-11 that was acting as Lotus Popemobile for the night but Ralph Firman wasn't so lucky when his Luxury Racing buggy driver demonstrated that you don't need a clutch to execute a bucking bronco take off!

Allan McNish meanwhile had had a sense of humour failure when presented, as were all the drivers with a miniature national flag to wave.  Now many of you may not know that Al is Scottish, if you listen carefully there's a hint of an accent, so he was less than amused when the local lovely in charge of this task proffered not his beloved Saltire but instead the cross of St George - Happily for McNish though he was sharing duties for the evening with Tom Kristensen who, in characteristically subtle style didn't in any way make a meal of the opportunity to torture his Caledonian co-pilot's wounded national pride.

After the show was over we walked down the still cordoned off main street, still with music blaring out of huge speakers and still with various stars of Motorsport motoring up and down trying to find a way out, past the junction where Tim Mullen's increasingly frantic buggy driver was starting his 14th trip around the inner ring road.

Saturday was a relatively relaxed day at the track but we'd promised ourselves an adventure in the evening - a trip to the apparently infamous underground markets, a place of legendary possibilities for gifts for home.

The DSC Editor arrived with a lengthy shopping list from the girls in the day job office, the pre-trip promise of 'designer' handbags at bargain prices prompting a series of requests for bags that, quite astonishingly cost over £1000 in the UK, for a bag!  I've paid less than that for a car!

The place was quite astounding and, sure enough the bags were there, and were either VERY convincing fakes, or were simply, in reality, the real deal, a sort of fringe benefit for somebody involved in the factory, a private enterprise run-on - Either way the asking price, after some stonewalling negotiation, was closer to the price of a three course meal than a five star holiday.  Gucci, YSL, Jimmy Choo - you name it, they had it!  There was a minor problem for yours truly as I had a couple of requests for the currently 'in vogue' Mulberry label which almost every shopkeeper (and there were a LOT of them) confused entirely with the chavtastic Burberry - Elegant leatherwork vs broad unattractive 'tartan'.

And then there were the watches! TAG Heuer sir? To you c.£25! It won't put a smile on the faces of the Ojjehs, and in fairness the ultimate quality is some way short of the real thing, but again, at least visually, these things are very convincing indeed.

Interestingly there were very few automotive brands represented in amongst the bewildering number of shops with their mix of high end trinkets - Ferrari was there of course, but the only other brand I saw was Audi, with wallets, bags and shirts all on display  - If imitation is the highest form of flattery then that says something, though I'm not sure everyone in Ingolstadt would agree!

If we'd had longer we'd surely have all been in real trouble with the baggage allowances on our return flights but there was one impulse purchase for Skippy and the now re-christened 'Rordy'- We passed a shop selling what can only be described as 'Military Chic' and there, hanging from the ceiling were a couple of crash helmets designed for motorbikes but in the image of the iconic MIG pilots' 'lid', complete with red star and dual clear and tinted visors - Very Top Gun!  One was in Jungle green and the other in Firefox white - They were a must-have.

We had a giggle with those of course and again they were unbelievably cheap - So IMSA Tech, expect a couple of snappers at Sebring 2012 asking whether these meet the standard for pit lane usage - that's if they don't get shot trying to come through US Immigration of course!

We'll spare SpeedTV.com's John Dagys's blushes by not revealing the details here of the now traditional race day 'wind-up' but suffice to say that a - we found it funny, b - he (eventually) did too and c - if he'd reached the media reception desk he'd have found them even more confused than he was at that point!

Later on Saturday evening saw the intrepid DSCers opt to dine al fresco in the street cafe we'd seen the night before - Think of it like Russian Roulette with seasoning!

The formula was simple - choose from a bewildering array of fish, meat and vegetables, plus the unavoidable - and near inedible - chicken feet - hand them to the cook in a basket and they'll be cooked in front of you while you wait.

What could possibly go wrong?

Well, as things turned out nothing at all - From Octopus and huge scallops through fish so fresh it was being given the last rites as we arrived and onto meat that may have been a beloved pet earlier in the day but was more likely of far more palatable extraction it was all delicious, and with enough food to satisfy all four of us plus beers and soft drinks the bill came to an eye watering £11 - not £11 each - £11 in total.

No Chips, no gravy and OK the surroundings were very basic and the cabaret was provided by a passing local cockroach but the food was fresh, the service friendly and rapid and, again, it was just so - different!

Race day was without notable incident (aside from the international standard Motorsport of course!) and the lengthy trek from the rather isolated Circuit main gate in the late evening in search of a taxi. 

We dined in quite the strangest Irish Bar I have ever seen, seemingly full of ex-pats with price tags to match and with a soulless Abu Dhabi Grand Prix on the big screen TV - it was by a distance the most Western experience of the trip and it was, by a distance, the most disappointing experience of the trip.

Monday dawned bright and early, the boys having announced their intention to investigate the fishing harbour opposite - That meant not only risking life and limb on a live industrial site, but also taking on the challenge of the six lane Road of Death between the hotel and our fishy objective

We managed to avoid a close encounter of the VW Jetta kind and then strolled into another world - A world where Health and Safety mean nothing, where manual labour is almost everything, and where maritime standards seemed to be of the Victorian variety.

Aside from the quite terrifying ice crushing plant, which reduced car sized block of ice to a barrowload of shavings in seconds, there was barely a machine in sight, the crews clearly live on these boats and living standards are best described as basic - It's worth reminding ourselves though that countless Chinese rely on these boats and their catches.

Basic standards or not they are providers of sustenance and economic independence, something that is often forgotten when we think of the economic strength of the Chinese nation.  The loads of gravel being carried by a seemingly tiny Chinese man were pretty humbling!

On the dock, alongside the gambling fishermen and extraordinary range of seafood being unloaded, stacked and despatched was a most unexpected sight - Had we perhaps stumbled across evidence of Audi Sport's until now secret 2012 attack on the Tour de France? Or had a fisherman bought a new bike from the underground market?

All too soon it was time to check out of the hotel, ask the doorman to risk life and limb once again, and board the ferry to Hong Kong, again with the very welcome assistance of he charming Christina Wu. 

With a limited number of ferry departures that morning the boat was packed with racing people - Bruno Famin and his Peugeot Sport crew, most of the European media pack, Larbre's Jack Leconte, some of the AF Corse boys, Neel Jani, Franck Mailleux and Messrs Fassler, Kristensen and McNish - If this thing went down the FIA WEC would be in serious difficulties!

The DSC boys found ourselves sharing the front row of seats with the Audi Sport drivers, happily right next to the snack bar - TK standing us a coffee and all three chatting and grabbing paddock gossip about prospects for WEC in 2012.

Mention should be made here though of the quite astonishingly weird choice of entertainment on board what was, let's remember, a fast ferry from Zhuhai to Hong Kong - A travel video perhaps? Immigration details?  Nope, instead we had Shaun the Sheep on continuous loop - Its international appeal though was soon proven as the laughter started from the Dane, Swiss and Scot (plus not a few Frenchmen behind!)

As the Ferry neared Hong Kong harbour we were passed, GTE / LMP 1 style, by one of the astoundingly rapid hydrofoils that plies the route between Hong Kong and Macao - Mr McNish was sufficiently impressed to grab a snap.

Hong Kong itself is astonishing - Any other city that claims a skyline needs to get in line - Literally thousands of high rise buildings cling to the thin strip of relatively level ground ahead of the hills beyond.  It's been a long held ambition to visit this place but we'd only be here for a few short hours.

Before we left for a lunch appointment though it was time to say farewell to the Audi boys, a brief conversation that included, seemingly at random, the entirely unexpected utterance, in a very convincing Geordie accent, by Tom Kristensen of the phrase "When the boat comes in!" Apparently it was very big in Denmark!

Hong Kong has a bustle like no other place on earth - a seething mass of traffic that moves, apparently with confidence of finding somewhere to park, in a 24 hour race all of its own!  The economic differences between Zhuhai and Hong Kong are immediately obvious, luxury cars and designer stores (real ones this time!)

For a Brit there are still plenty of reminders of the recent colonial history here, not least in the (albeit longer than the norm) double decker buses and the very English street names. 

But overall the whole place is a fascinating, confusing and bewitching mix of east and west - Cookie cutter western shops meet very down to earth Chinese back streets on every corner, terrifying looking bamboo scaffolding just a knotted rope from disaster it seems - I loved the place!

We'd arranged to meet for lunch with the ever welcoming Martyn and. Teresa Pass who were staying on for a couple of days to recover from the rigours of a very busy season.

They allowed us to drop our bags for a few hours in their hotel room which enabled us to take in their extraordinary view, and to experience the very pronounced sway that is a particular feature of tall buildings here in this typhoon troubled region.  Even with no other 'interventions' I'd be prepared to bet that motion sickness could be a real problem for anyone staying here!

We're prepared to bet though that the swing was much more pronounced across the water in Kowloon, from where Martyn took a call from the man we'd not long ago left at the ferry terminal, Allan McNish, who was having a 'Scottish breakfast' on the 102nd floor (of 118) in the International Commerce Centre, the world's fourth tallest building (step away from the obvious punch line).  (It's the building on the left of the shot below).

There was the generous offer to join the Audi drivers as they unwound from the rigours of their racing weekend but we already had a lunch date with the Passes as the famous Luk Yu Tea House, Hong Kong's oldest, established in 1933 and little changed since then.

The service was fantastic and the dim sun simply wonderful, including the largest prawn dumplings any of us had ever seen that needed a pair a scissors to get to grips with!

A traditional Chinese meal was a fitting way to end this trip, the jet lag and inevitable long haul man flu would follow, but for now we'd thoroughly enjoyed the adventure - even off the sign spotted later by Teresa Pass wasn't quite appropriate to our energy levels as we staggered aboard the Qantas (Skippy) and Virgin (Yours truly, Rordy and Doris) flights home - We'll be back, and next time we'll be bringing 'The American'!

GG